Spiritual Program of Action by a Staff Member

My brother died of this disease in February 2008. He was an alcoholic/addict though he did not want to admit it at times. I had 7 years clean at that time and kept trying to get him to go to meetings. His response was,” I don’t like those things. They keep talking about God.”

 When I got into AA I found out this is not a religion or a cult. It is just a spiritual program of action. I am sure that there are many out there with way more religious teachings than me. I’m just doing and believing in what makes sense to me. 

When trying to get clean I wanted to try every way to do this except for "that God thing." I was dual diagnosed. I was not only an alcoholic; I suffered from major depression and major anxiety. At least that is what the doctors told me. I was on many medications. I took 1800mg of Neurontin,1600 mg Wellbutrin and Risperdal on top of that. I was literally a walking zombie. That is what people told me that knew me at the time. I did not think so myself.

I wanted that spiritual experience so much that I was willing to try different ways except for action on my part. I saw an ad on TV that said, “For a better life call this number for this book.” I did. And about a week and a half later the book showed up with two Mormons attached to it. As you might have guessed, it didn’t work. I was trying to catch spirituality through osmosis.

Finding Faith Through the Big Book of AA

When I was finally ready to follow direction and read the Big Book the first thing that popped out at me is on page 52 the third paragraph down.

 “When we saw others solve their problems by a simple reliance upon the Spirit of the Universe, we had to stop doubting the power of God. Our ideas did not work but the God idea did.”
    
I also read “Faith without works is dead.”  I actually had to start trying to help other people. I had to start attending meetings regularly. I had to read and do what the Big Book said I needed to do. I had to work the 12 steps honestly and thoroughly. This is all what "into action" is all about.
    
I have already proven to myself that no one on earth could keep me clean and sober. Psychologists, psychiatrists, therapists, recovery homes, sponsors, family, friends and myself were of no power. Even my willingness to stay sober did not help. Something out there is keeping me sober and it is a Power Greater than Myself.

I only receive this Power by the action I take each day in the program. What is cool is that I was able to conceive this Power through listening, learning, and looking inward. With an open mind, it made sense to me. I heard in a meeting to" visualize what you would like your Higher Power to look like so when you pray you weren’t praying to empty space." This worked for me.

As you have read this you may have noticed I speak only of myself and my own experience. I have never walked in your shoes, so I do not know anything you might have experienced yourself. All I know is what I had to do and go through to get to where I am at today.

I am not a spiritual guru. There is no halo in my closet. I just try to do the right thing each day. I am far from perfect and I make mistakes, but my Higher Power forgives me. I am only human. I can’t think my way into good acting. I have to act my way into good thinking. I just try to do God’s will each day to the best of my ability. I also no longer take meds thanks to this Power.  There was a time when my psychiatric medication was an example of an alcoholic trying to find "an easier, softer way." They symptoms of my dual diagnosis have alleviated and my program allows me to stay sober and serene in life.
    
-- SLBTS Staff Member